I've been fortunate enough to be able to be trained in an attachment based model created by Dr. Johnson. Her she helps us understand why our relationships are so important.
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It is not complex. We never know what another person is going through or what they have been through and how impactful just listening can be on a person's self esteem. It makes folks feel seen, important and maybe even loved.
https://pca.st/3e9hsso7 Link to audio.
Dr. Sue Johnson & EVRYMAN co-founder Owen Marcus discuss how to use science to on the transform your relationship. Dr. Sue Johnson is a clinical psychologist, researcher, professor, author, speaker. She is one of the leading innovators in the field of couple therapy. Most of her research focuses on the efficacy of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT), a therapy she developed more than 30 years ago. It’s acknowledged as the gold standard in tested, proven interventions for couples. She is the author of numerous articles and books, including Love Sense and Created for Connection, and Hold Me Tight, which she has developed into an online course for couples.
When I look to the sky I find hope and peace. Clouds calm my soul. They bring rest to my mind. But lately, it has been hard to hold the calm and peace. I find my mind wandering and my soul restless. My brain is pinging around, constantly seeking answers and wondering when will this be over. If you find your heart restless, as I do sometimes, this blog help bring you back to the clouds. My colleague, Angela Topcu, LMFT, has written a timely blog that addresses the grief and loss we are experiencing during this Covid-19 sheltering in place dispensation. I hope you find it helpful and it helps you to hold on to stillness and calm. Click here to read it.
That Relationship Show Podcast interviews Jonice Webb, PhD writer of “Running on Empty.” Jonice’s book is about when everything about your upbringing was okay but something was somehow missing and you struggle. It is describes emotional neglect, it’s long term affects on a person and their relationships and how to heal. If your emotions were unattended to, dismissed, ignored or put down, this podcast and this book are for you.
I landed upon this video and it was extremely moving to me. What was most touching was when the animals felt heard, validated and understood there seemed to be a healing of some sort. I think we all crave and long to be heard, understood and validated. We need our untold stories to be seen. “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside of you.” Maya Angelou I rescued three feral kittens last July. We put a blanket out and their mother (we trapped and fixed her and now feed her) sleeps on our recliner in the backyard all day. I wish she could be tamed and a home found for her but she is too feral. Makes me sad because I know she wants to be close when she gazes at me through my kitchen window but her nervous system has been programmed to tell her humans are not safe. When this occurred to me I also thought, “I bet this happens to humans, too. Bad things happen, they get scared and then the nervous system tells them certain things or relationships aren’t safe. We call this trauma. We never know what anyone has been through and what might cause a reaction. All beings should be handled with care, love and compassion.”
Update: 2/10/2020 She now sleeps at the back door on a pillow all night. She ate some food at the back door while I watched at the door window yesterday. She is getting closer. Will I tame her? I don’t know. The “On The Couch” podcast with Naomi Rather and Deborah Curtis. They interviewed Jim Thomas, EFT trainer. This podcast’s focus is on what it feels like to be male or identify as male in a relationship during these days. He talks about the pressures and struggles men experience. Check it out here.
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