Sue talks candidly about her life, her mission and Emotionally Focused Therapy.

This is what we work on first in couples therapy. We help a couple come together and fight against the negative pattern that has over taken them and caused distress. Once this is accomplished deep rebounding and healing of the relationship can occur. The cycle de-ecalation stage is the usually the longest part of the therapy. Identifying and calming the cycle seems easy but for true de-escaation several things need to happen.

Partners need to be able to:

1. Identify their own position in the cycle
2. Own their position
3. Access softer emotions underlying their position
4. Own their softer emotions
5. Place the softer emotions into the cycle
6.Link partner's behavior to their own attachment emotions and their own reactive emotions
7.Link their own behavior to attachment emotions and partner's reactivity
8. Have a coherent story of the negative interaction cycle as the enemy
9. See partner as more fearful and dangerous
10.Identify cycle in the here and now
11.Interupt the cycle in a way that allows them to fight it together

​Once a couple can become a team against the cycle deep bonding can occur.  

Jim Thomas, Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy Trainer, talks about EFT, relationships, technology and staying connected in our modern busy world. Really nice podcast on relationships. Click here to listen.

​From Podcast:
Bill's first conversation with Jim Thomas, is the second-most popular Conscious Couples Conversation since its inception. In today's podcast, Jim Thomas talks about how so many couples seem to have lost their way, and he reveals the benefits of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) sessions and intensives.
Jim Thomas is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. He has served as President of the Colorado Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and Director of the Colorado Center for Emotionally Focused Therapy or EFT – which learned from its creator, Sue Johnson. Jim’s work focuses on helping people to be more fully aware and engaged in their lives - allowing deeper connection with others and a richer life.

The subject of apologies has been coming up in sessions lately. What I have been discussing with others is what makes up a true and genuine apology. How does one truly say I am sorry? What kind of apology makes an actual relationship repair? How does one acknowledge wrong doing without getting defensive? And what if the other person did something hurtful, too? In Emotionally Focused Therapy we  address injuries using something called the Attachment Injury Repair Model. Dr. Gannon and Dr. Jinich discuss this model and how to apply it in ours lives on the podcast developed by Hitched. Grab a cup of coffee and click here to enjoy an informative show. To read more about how to forgive click here. 

Who new Alanis Morissette has a mental health podcast. So very cool. If you want to know more about Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples. Here is the link. You have to open it in iTunes.